Fic: Smile for Me
Dec. 7th, 2006 05:33 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
silverness185.livejournal.com posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
bottom_draco*******
Title: Smile for Me
Author: Caroline (Silverness)
Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling
Beta(s): None
Rating: PG-13 (so far)
Genre: Romance/Drama/Angst, possible Tragedy
Warning(s): Angst, ooc, sap, slash
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco
Year: After the war.
Specifics: Dominant Harry and Submissive Draco
Summary
All Harry wants is for Draco to smile again. But with Harry's forgotten memories at what he had done to him, will he be able to succeed? Or will it be too late?
***
Harry's Point of View
***
I still don't understand.
Up until this day, I used to hate him. We got over our differences and such, and even started hanging around together. And yet, everything about him made my blood boil. His arrogant attidude, the sneer, the smirks, the superiority complex. If there's one thing he should have learned by now, is that he's far from superior from those he thinks of as inferior to him. In fact, he's so low now, that I even had a glorious few minutes to cherish on this fact.
I never thought of him as Draco, because he was always Malfoy to me. During school. But then...sometime during the war, we started growing closer, and the world suddenly flipped upside down, and not only did we become friends, but more than that. I still don't know exactly what it was, because I've lost my memory after a particular battle I had with the Death Eaters. The memories have slowly been coming back to me. And from what I've been able to recover so far, we must've had a pretty deep relationship. I don't know if it was love, but it appeared to be quite intense.
I say this because, whatever it was that happened the past few months, and that I seemingly forgot, has affected him physically and mentally. And I know that whatever it was, I was greatly involved, because whenever he looks at me now, I get the feeling he's like some kind of lost deer running straight to the headlights of an approaching automobile. He's always trying to run away from me now. I feel like the big bad lion.
And when I touch his arm and ask him if he's alright, he flinches and jumps back, as if I had burned him. He can't bear my touch, and it makes me wonder how on earth this was brought on, if we had much touching in our relationship before. I just don't understand. Did I rape him or something?
His reactions disturb me. When I first lost my memory, my patience for him was very thin. I didn't know what the hell was his problem, especially when he'd look at me with those wide, fearful grey eyes. I snapped at him several times, but this only worsened the situation. A few days later, I finally began to tolerate him a little more, and to have more patience with him. I even offered him a glass of water after seeing him in tears, for reasons beyond me. He's been doing that a lot though. Especially after I snap at him. That's why I tried avoiding him afterwards.
He's so pretty.
It's not often you see a pretty boy, and when you do, it's not supposed to send you strange, hungry sensations to your stomach. Or your groin. So I wasn't surprised when I recovered my first sexual memory with him. The only thing that surprised me was that I was being incredibly gentle as I made love to him, and this kind of stuff usually meant a loving relationship, didn't it? So did we actually have a loving relationship? It had to be; not to mention, he whispered love confessions in my ear, and I never responded back. I only smiled at him.
Smile.
He never smiles anymore... his face, although pale, was once alive. His cheeks were once flushed and adorable. His eyes were beaming, and his lips were smiling, always so full of life and happiness. Again, happiness. Just what was it that made him so happy?! I have never seen Malfoy happy about anything... except those memories that are slowly coming back to me. And his smiles whenever he was around me. But that was in a memory. In the past.
Now however, it was as if his lips were sewn in an upside down smile. I doubt he could even sneer or smirk any more. It wasn't easy to tell what he was feeling... he either looked numb, or full of pain. Pain in which he would never reveal anything to me, because he's so deathly afraid of me.
It's a little...bothersome, you know? To have someone be so scared of you, and you don't know why because you lost your memory. It's terrible. My stomach often clenches whenever I think of the countless horrible things I could have done to him to make him the way he is now.
He's fading away. Everyone can see it...he's dying inside, and there's nothing anyone can do about it, because everything just goes back to being my fault about something I've done to him.
I don't want it to be like this though. I want to recover all our memories together first. I want to try and fix whatever happened between us, even though I don't love him, I feel compelled to do this. And if it was a loving relationship we had before, then it gives me an even greater reason to try and help him.
But how can I approach him, if he won't let me? Will I be able to save him before it's too late?
And another big question...
What happened?
***
A/N: You guys remember my other story, You Don't See Me ? Yeah? Well, this is the rewritten version of it. Of course, it's nothing like it, but it's similar in a way, as I move along. This was supposed to be only a one-shot, but I can see now that it'll be a few chapters more.
Perhaps when I have it done, I'll put it all in one chapter, I don't know.
And if you still miss the old version of You Don't See Me, then just let me know, because I personally didn't like it, but if there are many people here that did, I can arrange a way for you guys to have a link to the old version if you want. ^^
Anyway! This is my first attempt at a tragic fic (though I have a feeling it might not end tragic) So obviously... this will be very angsty. But...I hope you guys are enjoying it so far?
***
Title: Smile for Me
Author: Caroline (Silverness)
Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling
Beta(s): None
Rating: PG-13 (so far)
Genre: Romance/Drama/Angst, possible Tragedy
Warning(s): Angst, ooc, sap, slash
Pairing(s): Harry/Draco
Year: After the war.
Specifics: Dominant Harry and Submissive Draco
Summary
All Harry wants is for Draco to smile again. But with Harry's forgotten memories at what he had done to him, will he be able to succeed? Or will it be too late?
***
Harry's Point of View
***
I still don't understand.
Up until this day, I used to hate him. We got over our differences and such, and even started hanging around together. And yet, everything about him made my blood boil. His arrogant attidude, the sneer, the smirks, the superiority complex. If there's one thing he should have learned by now, is that he's far from superior from those he thinks of as inferior to him. In fact, he's so low now, that I even had a glorious few minutes to cherish on this fact.
I never thought of him as Draco, because he was always Malfoy to me. During school. But then...sometime during the war, we started growing closer, and the world suddenly flipped upside down, and not only did we become friends, but more than that. I still don't know exactly what it was, because I've lost my memory after a particular battle I had with the Death Eaters. The memories have slowly been coming back to me. And from what I've been able to recover so far, we must've had a pretty deep relationship. I don't know if it was love, but it appeared to be quite intense.
I say this because, whatever it was that happened the past few months, and that I seemingly forgot, has affected him physically and mentally. And I know that whatever it was, I was greatly involved, because whenever he looks at me now, I get the feeling he's like some kind of lost deer running straight to the headlights of an approaching automobile. He's always trying to run away from me now. I feel like the big bad lion.
And when I touch his arm and ask him if he's alright, he flinches and jumps back, as if I had burned him. He can't bear my touch, and it makes me wonder how on earth this was brought on, if we had much touching in our relationship before. I just don't understand. Did I rape him or something?
His reactions disturb me. When I first lost my memory, my patience for him was very thin. I didn't know what the hell was his problem, especially when he'd look at me with those wide, fearful grey eyes. I snapped at him several times, but this only worsened the situation. A few days later, I finally began to tolerate him a little more, and to have more patience with him. I even offered him a glass of water after seeing him in tears, for reasons beyond me. He's been doing that a lot though. Especially after I snap at him. That's why I tried avoiding him afterwards.
He's so pretty.
It's not often you see a pretty boy, and when you do, it's not supposed to send you strange, hungry sensations to your stomach. Or your groin. So I wasn't surprised when I recovered my first sexual memory with him. The only thing that surprised me was that I was being incredibly gentle as I made love to him, and this kind of stuff usually meant a loving relationship, didn't it? So did we actually have a loving relationship? It had to be; not to mention, he whispered love confessions in my ear, and I never responded back. I only smiled at him.
Smile.
He never smiles anymore... his face, although pale, was once alive. His cheeks were once flushed and adorable. His eyes were beaming, and his lips were smiling, always so full of life and happiness. Again, happiness. Just what was it that made him so happy?! I have never seen Malfoy happy about anything... except those memories that are slowly coming back to me. And his smiles whenever he was around me. But that was in a memory. In the past.
Now however, it was as if his lips were sewn in an upside down smile. I doubt he could even sneer or smirk any more. It wasn't easy to tell what he was feeling... he either looked numb, or full of pain. Pain in which he would never reveal anything to me, because he's so deathly afraid of me.
It's a little...bothersome, you know? To have someone be so scared of you, and you don't know why because you lost your memory. It's terrible. My stomach often clenches whenever I think of the countless horrible things I could have done to him to make him the way he is now.
He's fading away. Everyone can see it...he's dying inside, and there's nothing anyone can do about it, because everything just goes back to being my fault about something I've done to him.
I don't want it to be like this though. I want to recover all our memories together first. I want to try and fix whatever happened between us, even though I don't love him, I feel compelled to do this. And if it was a loving relationship we had before, then it gives me an even greater reason to try and help him.
But how can I approach him, if he won't let me? Will I be able to save him before it's too late?
And another big question...
What happened?
***
A/N: You guys remember my other story, You Don't See Me ? Yeah? Well, this is the rewritten version of it. Of course, it's nothing like it, but it's similar in a way, as I move along. This was supposed to be only a one-shot, but I can see now that it'll be a few chapters more.
Perhaps when I have it done, I'll put it all in one chapter, I don't know.
And if you still miss the old version of You Don't See Me, then just let me know, because I personally didn't like it, but if there are many people here that did, I can arrange a way for you guys to have a link to the old version if you want. ^^
Anyway! This is my first attempt at a tragic fic (though I have a feeling it might not end tragic) So obviously... this will be very angsty. But...I hope you guys are enjoying it so far?
***
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